How To Be More Positive

Have you ever seen the show Ted Lasso?

If not, you really should. It’s about an American bloke who’s hired to coach an English soccer team, even though he has absolutely no idea about the game.

Anyway, despite all the crap he cops from the people who want him to fail, Ted remains happy, even though he faces a stack of challenges along the way. Want to know why? Because he has a positive attitude.

For those of us facing hardship, remaining positive may be a big challenge, but it’s a challenge we should all face head-on, because a positive attitude goes a long way towards a happy and successful life. 

Let’s look how you can be more positive. 

Are you one of those blokes who constantly puts himself down with negative thoughts like “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m never going to achieve anything"? 

If so, bloody stop doing it. It’s destructive and if you repeat it often enough, it’ll end up being a self-fulfilling prophesy. Instead, start thinking about yourself in a positive light and repeatedly think things like “I will get through this,” and “I’m more than capable of achieving this goal,” and “I am a strong person.” Do this enough, and your positive thoughts will become the self-fulfilling prophesy and good things will likely come your way.

As a rule of thumb, try to follow this recommendation from the College of Health Care Professionals: “Don't say things to yourself that you would never say to a friend or loved one. Be as accepting, understanding, gentle and encouraging with yourself as you would be with someone you hold dear.”

Keen readers of this blog would notice that this is a tip we also put forward in our blog on How To Boost Your Mood Without Food, but it’s worth repeating. Rather than focusing on the bad things in your life, focus on the good things like having access to shelter, your family, health care and quality food. These things you’re grateful for don’t need to be monumental, they can just be little things that have happened recently (think about the great coffee you had this morning).

To reinforce this lesson, you MUST make a daily habit of reminding yourself what you’re grateful for. In the aforementioned ‘Boost Your Mood’ blog, we recommended writing a gratefulness diary every day.

Whether we like it or not, the behaviour of the people we hang out with often rubs off on us. With that in mind, start hanging out with positive people rather than negative ones and soon enough their positivity will rub off on you. You’re more likely to recognise a ‘glass half full situation’ if someone points it out. 

It’s also worth noticing that positive people are generally more fun to spend time with. Think about it, who would you rather talk to? A bloke who is light, friendly and up for a good time, or some weasel who just mopes around and complains about everything under the sun?

In these modern times, we are so quick to jump to conclusions and judgements without thinking things through. This can often be bad for our positivity, as we are very likely to jump to a negative conclusion which makes our mood worse. 

To stop this from happening, start being curious. Be open-minded to new experiences, ask people questions and attempt to understand new perspectives on things. Being curious should ultimately foster better knowledge and understanding, help you solve more problems and in turn make you a more positive person. 

Laughing is VERY good for you. Not only does it release endorphins, it’s also linked to reduced stress and improved immunity. Additionally, it’s been shown distract us from negative thoughts and thus put us in a better frame of mind. With that in mind, regularly watch comedy films or attend a stand-up night at your local club. Chances are a good belly laugh or two will end up putting you in a good mood. 

And remember, laughter is contagious, so bring some friends along as well, that way everyone will end up a little cheerier. Likewise, try to laugh with people, not at them!

News flash: you’re going to encounter people who will piss you off during your day. The secret to remaining positive is not to let inconsiderate people get to you and to not retaliate over petty things (e.g. cutting in front of you in traffic or cutting in line). 

When you feel like someone has wronged you, rather than lashing out or stewing over it, take a deep breath and simply let it go. You’ll feel better for it, and the more often you practice this technique, the happier you’ll feel.

Taking care of your physical and mental health is highly important (duh!). People who make positive steps towards taking care of their physical health (like blokes who have The Man Shake) also up being more positive, because their increased energy and stamina makes them feel better, think more clearly and thus make better decisions. 

That said, you don’t need to be a fitness machine to foster a positive attitude. If you have just started (or are in the middle of) your fitness journey, you have plenty to be positive about as well, because you have consciously made the choice to get better, and thus have every reason to feel proud.

While routines may not be everyone’s cup of tea, they are highly important to developing good habits like increased positivity. If you’re looking to be a happier person, start from the very moment you wake up by penciling a quick meditation or deep breathing session. That should get your day off to the right start. Likewise, try implementing a good bedtime routine. We suggest winding down with a good book, or a nice relaxing shower, before adding an entry to your gratitude diary.

As an extra tip, try recording your successful efforts when sticking to a routine. Checking off those tasks will add an extra sense of satisfaction, which will make you more likely to stick to tasks.

On a final note, if you are trying these techniques and are still struggling with negativity, you may want to seek some professional help. There are plenty of trained mental help professionals out there who would be willing to help you out, and services like Lifeline, Black Dog Institute and Beyond Blue.